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Why You Need a Teacher Bestie



"Great news, Retta! We finally found someone who can work with you!" my principal announced as I entered the school on a frosty fall morning. It was my second year in the building, and I was a teaching dynamo, changing the world one child at a time, alone, and behind my classroom door.  Why would I need friends at work when I had lots of friends "on the outside", in real life? I was there to work with kids and to make a difference. Right?

Wrong. I could not have been more wrong! A close teacher friend, one who is on staff with you, "in the trenches" with you, who has your back and leads the way, who will vent with you and swell with pride with you, who is going through your own teaching experience at the same time and in real time, is the single most important contributor to your mental state as a teacher, and in fact may be the biggest reason that you continue in your teaching career. My research on this? Personal experience over 36 years in the classroom and more than a few years now on the outside!

Planning Partners

That new teacher friend, "finally someone who can work with you", turned out to be a friend for life. Our teaching philosophies did not always run on the same track, but we always made it work for the kids and for us. Our team planning sessions went on for hours because we did not easily agree on everything, but our classrooms sailed along harmoniously because our ultimate goal was the same: learning, acceptance, and security for our kids. She later teamed up with my real-life best friend for a long and rewarding career. The two of them have always been amazing together, and my teacher heart is happy just watching them in action!

I have been so lucky to have a teacher bestie at every twist and turn in my teacher life, and this post is just a love letter to each of them, and to the universe for placing each of them in my life.

Team Mates

My first teaching bestie was actually our whole intern team during my very first year in a University lab school. We were alone in our classrooms and under the microscope with University representatives, curriculum designers, and the media at every turn. But we had each other, some amazing Friday night school is out parties, and close personal friendships at each grade level. My grade level bestie, K, and I cheered each other's fledgling successes and knew exactly how to take each other down a notch when our heads were getting too big. Her voice remained in my ear throughout my career, although we parted company and lost touch when I moved out of state in the days long before social media.

Friends for Life

My next teaching bestie (and real life one too!) was a friend that I met after moving. Raising babies and waiting out a crowded teaching job market (Yes, that was once a thing!), we met through a charitable organization that we joined to spread education love around the world. We discovered that our teaching philosophies were so aligned that we were almost the same person in the classroom! We taught together, first in a private school, and later in two separate schools of our district, always planning together and drawing in the rest of our onsite teams. We wrote a book together and presented at conferences together for many years. Maybe you even came to one of our sessions called "Have Your Cake and Teach it Too"! We used food to teach so many concepts, drawing kids in with our unabashed love for cooking and for teaching and for kids!

Sharing Strengths

Another teaching bestie was a music teacher who hated teaching science. He and I would switch classes for one hour a day. I taught science and technology to his kids, and he taught this musically-challenged teacher's class to sing and play simple instruments. We also put on some awesome musical plays together! I loved talking with him at the end of each teaching day to laugh together at all that had happened. His unique sense of humor taught me to not ever take myself too seriously.  He left this world way too soon, but his friendship and unique sense of humor impact me even today.

Offering Different Perspectives

My longest-running teaching bestie is still my friend today. She is my "little sister" for life, an important piece of my heart. If you don't open your heart to the possibility of real friendships found and nurtured at work, you will have denied yourself a treasured life experience. While we appeared very different in our lesson delivery, we complemented and supported each other every day. She was more attuned to the struggling students, and I was geared more toward the gifted group. We individually assessed and prescribed for our kids, moving them back and forth smoothly between our rooms to maximize success for all!
When our school was targeted for closure, we moved together to a new school and welcomed two more besties into our partnership. Three of the four of us are now retired, and still friends. More proof that relationships that grow and are nurtured at school can last your whole life long.

Bringing New Ideas

One member of our little team at the last school in my classroom career led me to new horizons and new friendships through TpT, my everlasting connection to teachers and teaching. I used a center approach as part of my practice throughout every year of my classroom teaching. I worked hard every weekend and for several hours every weeknight to keep my center activities fresh, rigorous, and relevant. My team members were always all in, and we planned it all together. At one planning session when we were up against a data deadline as well as a lesson planning one, J said, "Why don't we find an activity for the math station on Teachers Pay Teachers?" I laughed and said, "That's a joke, right? We can pay another teacher to make our center stuff?" She responded that not only was it not a joke, but she pulled out a file of several choices that she had already purchased, downloaded, and printed. She also suggested that I put my center resources on TpT to help other time-pressed teachers when they need it. That little planning meeting led to Rainbow City Learning on TpT, 400 resources and counting, Bullyproof Rainbow, and all the friends that this online community has brought to me: blogging buddies, a podcast group, and more online groups than I can accurately count. Not to mention the friends who have jumped from online buddies to true, lifelong friends.

Who is YOUR Teacher Bestie?

Why do you need a teacher bestie? To enrich your life, push you to be a better teacher, entice you to stick with it when the going gets rough, to lift you up, and to keep you grounded. In the interest of keeping this post to a reasonable length, I have not mentioned all who have filled this important role in my life. I am grateful to each one, and each has a special place in my heart.

Who is YOUR teacher bestie, and why? I would LOVE to hear all about it in the comments!









Be sure to check out the blogs of my blogging buddies at Teacher Talk this month! Want to join us? Email me at retta.london@gmail.com to find out how!


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3 comments

  1. My teacher bestie was the varsity baseball coach in the classroom next door. He and I are both grammar nerds, and contrary to the unfair stereotyping of many coaches, Mike was a brilliant and effective classroom teacher. We live in different states now, but he was my friend and co-worker for over twenty years. Every teacher needs a bestie with whom they can connect and collaborate.

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  2. This post really hit home. I was lucky enough to teach with my Bestie. Together we had a great team. We laughed, cried & disciplined with each other's support. Made my teaching so much more enjoyable. Thanks for sharing this great post, Retta.

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  3. Awwww, I love this post so much!! It brought back so many memories of my teaching besties; some of whom go back 30+ years! I agree; having a colleague as a confidant, cheerleader, and sounding board is so important!

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